THIRTEEN WORK SHENANIGANS

This isn't a typical "The Office" type list. This is actual stuff that exists or has happened at my workplace. Oh, the things that make you go hmm...

1. Patron drops ten-year old child off FOR THE DAY. No supervision, not even a quarter to call home with in case of an emergency.

2. Strange man with fondness for ladies' lingerie seats himself opposite attractive younger girls and displays his collection for their admiration.

3. Woman takes purse to bathroom yet leaves her 3-year old child alone, unsupervised.

4. Incontinent man is dropped off at front door and not only doesn't make it to the restroom in time, he leaves his poopy diaper on the floor. Yes, a grown man.

5. Registered sex offender sits regularly at chair which is technically outside the children's area but offers a stellar view of said area.

6. Rebellious teen jerks off in the department bathroom and sprays his "stuff" on the floor, walls, toilet, mirror, etc...

7. Space cadet mother is so into surfing the web she fails to notice her toddler is heading for the exit. Alone. Unsupervised. Again.

8. Parent takes child to bathroom. Child pees all over the floor in front of the toilet. One of them decides that throwing a bunch of toilet paper over the spot will solve the problem.

9. Gentleman of questionable sanity "wags his weenie" at passers-by.

10. Dirty, odorous and homeless man turns soft chairs into toxic napping spots.

11. Older gentleman corners patrons and flashes swastika cards at them, whispering "Zieg Heil!" over and over.

12. Patron yaps endlessly on cell phone directly in front of the "No Cell Phone Usage" sign.

13. Parent allows child to run barefoot over carpet that has been walked, ran, peed, pooped, bled and vomited on in the past.

Are you going "hmmm..." yet? Can't believe all this stuff could happen in one place? It can, and does, at a place most people in the world would say is safe and wonderful. Can you guess where I work?

I work at the library.

.