Thursday, January 17, 2008

THIRTEEN THINGS ABOUT THE FS (FORMER SWEETIE) THAT AGGRAVATE


Well, I had this post finished and published and went back to edit one tiny little thing... and Blogger decided to eat the post. So here it is (more or less) again:
It's amazing how perspective changes once a relationship ends and recrimination sets in. Still more amazing how those little things you put up with before turn into things that make you want to bash him one after.


1. He wants me to pay rent until Son and I move out. Plus half utilities. Okay, I have to pay all my own expenses, plus rent/utilites to him and SOMEHOW save money for a house at the same time.
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2. He doesn't listen. Once he gets an idea in his head, he's done. Doesn't matter what you say or if you drag in a panel of experts, he still believes what he believes.
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3. He acts like the last six years never existed. Like Son and I just showed up at his doorstep yesterday.
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4. He is cynical and skeptical to a fault. Example: he asked the other day about my househunting progress. I started to tell him and wham! Those people are just ripping you off, they only want to make a profit, blah blah blah... like I am the stupidest rube to ever step on planet Earth.
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5. He repeats himself. Did I mention he repeats himself? Like if he just keeps saying it you'll agree out of exhaustion or something. Oh, and did I mention he repeats himself?
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6. He's sneaky. As in editing what he tells you, hiding stuff... not the kind of mystery you want to have in a relationship.
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7. He portrays himself as Mr. Logical all the time. Mr. Spock's got nothing on this guy.
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8. Asking a "yes or no" question never gets you a "yes or no" answer. Question: "Did the team win the game?" Answer: "Well, first there was this interception with ten seconds to go and then the ball went back to the 600 yard line and the tailback connected to the quarterback and..."
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9. He lives in a "my actions/decisions affect no one but me" bubble. For example: Go out drinking with your buddies after work. Choose to do a bazillion shots of Jaegermeister because your "friends" keep saying "Come on, man, come on, man," and get so wasted you have to check into a hotel overnight. Don't call me or anything, either. Meanwhile I'm at home, worried to death that you're dead on the highway somewhere and I don't sleep all night. Then when you come home, sidestep the real issue and keep repeating yourself about how "responsible" you were for checking into a hotel.
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10. He likes to pretend that everything is just fine. Like that movie "50 First Dates", it's like he reboots every night when he's asleep.
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11. He wants to be 25 forever. I have nothing against being active and having fun--but you can have fun and be a grown-up, too.
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12. He really believes that living life on the surface is okay. Like, don't get involved, don't examine your conscience, don't pursue deeper intimacy... just have fun! Fun fun fun!!!
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13. "I'm sorry that you're upset." Okay, you want to upset me? Tell me that. Redirect the issue and make it MY problem. I LOVE THAT.
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I promise I'll have a nicer, more FUN Thursday Thirteen next week.




2 Comments:

spyscribbler said...

Ugh, that's terrible! It's so true. Men have an amazing ability to just ... turn themselves off emotionally and be done with ... whatever. And just be fine.

Or at least, some men do. It's why, as a species, I'm generally incredibly reserved and protective of myself. How DH ever got through that shield, I don't know.

*hugs*

Rhonda Stapleton said...

((hugs)) I am so sorry...it's amazing how different men and women are. You keep on being you, and you'll find someone who is wonderful for you and your son!!! WE LOVE YOU!